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There Are Times When I Wonder Why The Ennglish Dictionary Was Invented (Or - If English Is Such A "Beautiful Language" Why Do We Insist On Mangling It So Much???)
Sometimes English can be used in the strangest of ways without anybody realising it.

For example one menu I read seemed - at first glance - to offer "Barbecued Kids" (as in small humans).  When I pointed this out the owner of the cafe I was in pointed out that they meant children's portions of Barbecued Pork Ribs.

Then there was the sign outside a Travel Agents which - at first glance - seemed to have entered the Slave Business.  It was only after I had got close enough to read the entire sign that I found out the Travel Agents were selling One Austrailian Dollar for £1.50 and not One Australian.

However, my favourite one is to be found on a "Professional" website.  I ended up laughing at what came into my brain when I first read the following;

Cravings - Handouts.

This could go two ways - either the cravings themselves could be handed out or the items which are being craved could be handed out.

Oh dear - and until that point the website was dry, clinical, and almost without humour.

Although I have to give you one more courtesy of my parents - and you will see why in a minute.

One day my Mum asked my Dad something about the word "Manifold".  The definition he gave her left me with a very strange thought in my head regarding one particular hymn.

According to my Dad a "Manifold" is part of a car's exhaust system.

Now my brain has decided that a car's exhaust system actually appears in a hymn where we sing about "Manifold Witness".

Strange how English loses all logical meaning some times, isn't it???

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