I have a question for you - what qualities do you look for in a friend?
The worst question I was ever asked in a job interview (and it completely put me off the idea of working for the company who was interviewing me) was "what sort of friend would your friends say you are?" (or words to that effect).
Seeing as I value loyalty, respect, and trust, very highly indeed when it comes to my friends - all I could say is "you would have to ask them". And - no - I didn't hand the interviewer my mobile so they could ring one of them!!!
There are certain qualities you will definitely need (as well as the three mentioned above) if you want to be friends with me which may be a little different to what most people look for in a friend.
Anybody who has spent any longer than five minutes in my company (either in real life or on Social Media) will definitely agree with this one - you need a sense of humour which can handle quirkiness. To say I am not the most conventional person on Planet Earth is something of an understatement. I can just about guarantee that I will either say or do something which you will find strange.
Another quality which I look for in my friends is something else which may make people (usually English people) feel seriously uncomfortable is - straight-talking to the point of bluntness. I have an extremely low threshold for people who "dress things up" or go around the houses, or try to put things in such a way as not to offend people. "Let your 'yes' be yes and your "no" be no is something I live by. I have been hurt too many times by people who have not said exactly what they meant. I don't deal very well with having to work out the intentions of other people.
But - I hear you ask - what do I get in return???
According to some of my friends you get the services of a non-judgemental Sounding Board. Unless you say or do something to upset me, my friends, or family, you can say what you want to me and it won't go any further (unless, of course you are planning on breaking the law).
You will get help - if you are prepared to attempt to help yourself at the same time.
A free comedy service can also be arranged. Especially if I think you need cheering up. This is usually performed with me as the subject as well as the comedian. I don't mind taking the Mickey out of myself (but I wouldn't advise anybody else to take the Mickey out of me if they have just met me).
You also get loyalty, honesty, respect, and caring fitted as standard.
So, what are the signs that I consider you to be a close friend???
You get the real me to start with. The more comfortable I feel with you the more quirky I can get. You might even find me saying exactly what I think when I think it (without feeling like I have to filter my words to protect you). And - if I feel really comfortable around you I might gently tease you about some aspect of yourself which I find interesting. For example, have you got an interesting accent??? One of my very longstanding friends has found themself being called "Pocket-Size" (and - trust me - I wouldn't dare say it if I hadn't known them for over 30 years).
You also get trust, loyalty, respect, and honesty. And when I say "honesty" I definitely mean that. You will soon learn that I mean exactly what I say.
Another thing you will get is my support in whatever you do (as long as it is legal and not likely to harm anyone in anyway). My close friends have accidentally ended up with free advertising on this very blog. I love showcasing my friends and their talents. Singers, writers, photographers, etc. If you are a close friend of mine and you have a talent and/or a project I support the aims of you are guaranteed a bit of free publicity.
I hope this gives you a bit of a taster of what it can be like to be classed as my friend. If you want to know more about the kind of friend I am you could always find out if you know any of my friends personally and ask them.
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